08 2 / 2014
I don’t think anyone I know irl follows this blog. That is partially why I want to post here. I also realize that next to nobody follows me, and the few who do won’t care. I just needed to send this out to the void.
I don’t know if I can do it any more. The stresses of everyday life are just to much for me to handle now. I want to be clear though that I am not suicidal. That thought crossed my mind once, years ago, and it scared the crap out of me. I will never consider that as an option ever again.
I just want to escape. I feel like I’m failing as a husband and provider. I feel lonely even though I know my best friend (my wife) and my family is always by my side. Sometimes when I am alone at the computer I just want to crawl under the desk and see if I can just hide from it all.
The worst part of it all is that there is no escape. I just have to keep going to work. I have to keep looking for a better job even though it stresses me out to the point of being physically ill. Because of the stress and anxiety I have had constant stomach pains for months. They have gotten worse in the last week or so.
If anyone does read this all the way through, I’m sorry. I know this is my problem. Thanks for reading though and thanks for following me
29 10 / 2013
As much as I love 11’s fez and 4’s scarf, my favourite has to be Jon Pertwee. I love his frilled shirts and fancy cravats. And he had a cape, what’s better than a cape?